Saturday, February 5, 2011

Timmah Fully Loaded

Timmah Fully Loaded
It was to be a big month for little Timmah Geithner.  He was about to raise the debt ceiling like a zombie movie raises the dead, and at the same time act like China was manipulating their currency and no one else was.  Ben Shalom Bernanke walked into the living room.  Never sheepish, he asked Timmah to do the dishes, "You may finish your game after."
Timmah had stocked up on Jolt, Buzz, Flatline, and numerous other high caffeinated beverages for the new release of "Timmah Battles the Algo Machines from Hell:  Fully Loaded."  He was most likely going to play his PPT video game counsel for the next couple winter months as his main source of entertainment.  Well, that and watch old Disney movies.
The snow was keeping everyone inside.  Luckily for Timmah's Treehouse, Bawknee Fwank couldn't climb the frozen bars that lead up the trunk in the winter.  Timmah mostly had it to himself, as Bernanke spent most of his time in Davos and Jackson Hole.  Tonight he was having his friend Sackman for a sleep over.
"Sackman, do you want to play PPT?"  Asked Timmah.
"After we guzzle some Flatline!"  Sackman said as he drowned his brain in dye and chemicals.
Timmah ran to his bean bag chair.  "OK, we are going to load up the futures by buying penny stocks!"
"Oh cool!"  Said Sackman.
"Yeah, it works every time.  Bernanke showed me how to do it."
"How to do what?"  Asked Bernanke irately from the other room.
"I was just telling Sackman about the futures trick." There was an awkard silence after Timmah spoke.  Bernanke sat at his desk pressing buttons on his printer.
"How long will it take you to beat this game?"  Said Sackman gleefuly.
Timmah frowned, "I don't know.  I beat the last one in just a few days."  Sackamn sat cross legged and leaned over his pelvis with a cheshire grin.  His face was inches from the screen.
"Back up!"  Yelled Timmah.  "I can't see!"

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