Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Ice Cream

It was a warm night in Hawaii when LawWrench Summers drove his ice cream truck down the beach.  He was chugging down a Coca-cola float.  He loved the way the mercury from the HFCS laced his brain's pathways.

"Ice cream, ice cream!"  Yelled brothers Barrock and George from the shoreline.  They ran back to the hotel pool where Darth Cheney was harassing the help.  "Come on sugar, show me your jugs."  The attendant ignored him.  "Raa."  Darth whined with disappointment.  Al Gore who was lying in a chair next to him with a towel over his eyes.  He lifted it up and squinted as he said, "Darth you got to be smooth man.  That's what Billy taught me.  Be smooth."  "Raa, and you are the smoothest around, raa!"  "Jealous much?  Muahahaha."

"Uncle Cheney?"  Interrupted 'Lil Bush.  "Can I have some monie for some ice cream?"  "Raa.  Here's a quarter."  "Me too, me too!"  Yelled little Barrock.  "Raa."  He flipped another quarter their way.  "To bad you do not have girls."  "They aren't mine!  I am watching them for Rockefeller.  Raa."  "Well if they were girls you could sell them off to the highest Goldman Sachs trader like Billy did."  "Do you ever shut up about him?!  Raa!"

The boys ran for the ice cream truck but Summers only drove faster.  'Look at them run!'  He laughed to himself.  Finally he stopped.  "What'll it be boys."  "Do you have anything for a quarter?" asked little Barrock.  "I have Jelly Smellies for fifty cents."  "Let's share!"  Smiled 'Lil Bush as he put his hand on his shoulder.  "Yeah!"  Agreed little Barrock.

Summers handed 'Lil Bush the dessert and he promptly ran away.  Barrock began to cry.  "Quit your crying, boy, he stole that fair and square."  He laughed loudly as he drove off.  Barrock walked back to where Darth Cheney was loungin'.  "Raa, stop your crying boy."  Barrock looked like he was all alone and without any ice cream.  Poor Barry.

But Barry would get ice cream come hell or high water.  He went to the bar where Hu was working.  He asked Hu for some ice cream.  "I give you ice cream after you pants Al Gore in front of the pool."  "No prob, Bob!"  Al Gore was stretching his arms high in the air.  He made eye contact with a young asian girl, and winked at her.  Little Barrock came up from behind and pulled down his pants.  The girl blushed and covered her mouth, "Little penis!"  She giggled.  Hu was pleased and gave little Barrock his dessert.  'He has a smaller penis than me!' thought Hu.

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